Publications
Partners
While it may be exciting and even enjoyable having family around during the festive season, it’s also a time where old arguments and tensions come up. Suddenly old family spats, expectations and commitments can materialize out of nowhere and leave you confused, angry and with less money than you had before.
While you may have the best intentions of saving money over the festive season, family members may have a way of getting under your skin and making you spend more than you intended to. Competitiveness, returning of favours and feelings of obligation may surface and all of these things will have an impact on your wallet.
Christmas, and the days before and after, is a great source of stress for many and some studies suggest that this time of the year can literally give you a heart attack. If your family gatherings stress you out and results in you forking out more money, here are a few tips and tricks you can adopt to ensure you’re not left out of pocket or anxious.
Scenario 1: The expectation of the expensive gift
There is always one person in the family who buys expensive gifts and who now expects a similarly priced it present in return. Or perhaps you end up competing with your siblings over who can give the parents the best gift?
READ: Money Makeover: How to boost your income
The solution: Decide how much you can afford and get your family to agree to a cap that you will spend on presents. Alternatively, agree that this season will be all about the children and that the adults should go without a present. If that’s not a solution, consider a Secret Santa gift exchange. This is where everyone in the family writes down a name on a piece of paper, puts it in a hat and then has to draw a name. You get to buy a gift for the person that you draw out. Again, you can enforce a spending cap.
Scenario 2: Dealing with fees for sending money abroad
A member of one social forum complained how her mother-in-law appeared ungrateful after she sent over money for each family member only for the final amounts to come out at the other end at an uneven number, which her mother-in-law wanted topped up to a rounded figure.
READ: Money Makeover update — When car finance drags you down
The solution: Exchange rates and bank fees can all eat into the money that we send overseas to our respective family members. Remember to compare charges from a variety of reputable companies that specialize in transferring money abroad and opt for the cheapest provider. If the transfer results in an awkward figure that has to be divided between family members suggest that the person receiving the money on the other side rounds the amount down and then keeps the rest of the money as payment for bank transfer or cash withdrawal fees.
Scenario 3: Expectations of extensive travel
This is a time where everyone suddenly wants to see you but usually few want to be the ones doing the commuting. Visiting various family members can be costly as you drive from one home to another with your car guzzling fuel.
READ: Money Makeover — The festive season survival plan 101
The solution: If family members live far away perhaps agree to visit every alternate holiday season. If that is frowned upon, explain to your family that you want to keep travel costs to a minimum. Suggest having a family gathering at your home or get them to meet in one manageable place that’s not too far from where everyone lives. Consider using public transport as this is generally cheaper.
Scenario 4: Investing in the next ‘big thing’
Some family members create stress by bragging about their new venture that will make them millionaires. But isn’t it strange how they’re always looking for another family member to get in on the game too? Whether it’s investing in an unknown cryptocurrency or something that sounds like a Ponzi scheme, you have to tread carefully when Uncle John talks about getting rich because he’s found the perfect investment scheme.
READ: Money Makeover special report page
The solution: If you’re not enthusiastic about the idea feign interest and then say you’ve had a few drinks and will discuss it when the festive season is over. Then you can take some time to study any paperwork or discuss the investment prospect with a reputable financial advisor to find out whether it’s legitimate. But don’t be pressured to buy in as you’re carving up the turkey.
Scenario 5: The relative who expects a handout
Some family members use the holidays as an opportunity to borrow money. Some may promise paying you back while others just expect you to help out, perhaps because they were supportive of you in the past. You generally feel pressured to give – it is the season of giving after all!
The solution: It’s only natural to give at Christmas, but there’s a danger that you could become the family ATM. Say that you want to help but as it’s a personal matter you’d like to do so privately. When you’re alone, try to find out what it is they need and what they need it for. If it’s to repay debt tell them that in return you want them to sit down with you and a financial advisor to set up repayment plan to get them out of debt. If you give without your needy family member finding a solution to their financial problems, you’ll be expected to do the same every year.
