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Every August, we are fêted, noticed, admired, appreciated and encouraged to break the glass ceiling. What a special experience.
During this month, the challenges faced by women in the workplace, in society and even in their homes, are recognised.
The impact and successes achieved by women all over the world are being acknowledged.
It would be great if these highlights were shared more regularly and consistently, with practical lessons that can equip women.
While we feel good about being in focus and in the limelight for the whole month of August, I have penned this letter to you, my sisters, mothers and grandmothers of our rainbow nation, on how we can break through the glass ceiling without men’s permission or favour:
Dear South African women
Sexism is alive and well in our society, whether we like it or not. And that doesn’t go away with celebrating Women’s Month with pomp and fanfare. Until and unless we make a specific effort to ensure our sons, our brothers, our uncles, our fathers and our husbands choose to make a difference, things will, sadly, continue to be the same.
Here are my suggestions on how we can break through the glass ceiling without waiting for favours from our bosses, our sons, our brothers, our uncles, our fathers and our husbands:
- Change must come from within our own ranks first. We may have the laws promoting gender equity, but walk the streets, peer into homes and offices, and you will notice that these rights, for the most part, remain on paper. It is our responsibility to influence the men around us towards acknowledging that we are not objects to conquer or to leer at or harass just to make them feel macho. Let us remember that for every gender issue we overcome, there are hundreds of women yearning for basic human rights and dignity all over the world.
- Do not ask for permission to do your job. Demonstrate your competence and ability to deliver. If you are prevented, persevere.
- Strive to be recognised for your talent, not gender. Do not overemphasise your gender, lest you are seen to undermine your talent. Play the accomplishment card with humility. Let your delivery speak for you.
- Pick your battles. Don’t be seen as the confrontational type. If you argue and fight for recognition, you will spend your life fighting battles, rather than advancing your career. Speak softly and avoid using gender-sensitive language such as “you guys” or “you men”. Speak authoritatively and let your work do the talking.
- Always table women’s issues as human issues and raise them in the context of business issues. Don’t play the gender card when discussing things such as maternity leave, but rather frame them as work-life balance within the business context.
- Don’t be afraid to seek male allies. While women mentors and mentees are preferable, it is never a bad idea to have a male mentor. Volunteer to mentor men. Men as a gender are not the enemy. Find men who get it and seek their support.
- Don’t assume that all women are allies. The catalyst of change must come from your own ranks. Remember that some women are harder on women than they are on men. Don’t try to change them. Align with women who favour equal opportunity, and who support both women and men. In this context, avoid supporting only women and bashing all men as competitors.
- Do not underplay and undersell yourself. We have a natural modesty that holds us back and makes us hypercritical of what we do. If someone pays us a compliment, we spend the next half an hour explaining it away, rather than just saying thank you and accepting it. Build your confidence and affirm your greatness. Make resilience your best friend. Inadequacy and inferiority should be your enemy.
- Be yourself. What we need is authenticity to be the best we can be. Bring the best of your abilities to your game, continuously stretching yourself beyond your comfort zone. Acknowledge your limitations and identify obstacles that compromise your growth. Make it your mission to address these gaps. Your personal development is your utmost responsibility.
Lastly, as you know, the glass ceiling is the invisible and sometimes impenetrable barrier that prevents us women of talent from rising as high as men of equal talent. So, my sisters, speak with your own voice and don’t go through life quietly. The world is your oyster.
I implore you to be confident, strong-willed and serious-minded so you can meet the challenging curve balls thrown at you, but always remain authentic and humble. Please continue to be a leader wherever you are and stay grounded on values. Be a leader who recognises that supporting and caring for others is a great investment that will ensure that we all succeed. Together, we will never fail to break through the glass ceiling.
Yours sincerely
Tryphosa
Ramano is president of the Association of Black Securities and Investment Professionals
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