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Valentine’s Day was all the talk on social media with the failure of the inaugural Men’s Conference and the Netflorist delivery debacle. But M-Net decided to use the day to unveil its newest show, The Bachelor SA.
Love and romance was the theme in the form of an intimate picnic under a white marquee at Glenshiel, an inner-city manor in Westcliff, which is a rather decadent venue. The old-school brick-and-wood mansion has a well-manicured garden which was made available to the guests of the show who were given blankets, wine and a tote bag of goodies to eat.
Being an eligible bachelor, I was sent to this V-day event, alone, which was a little tough especially at the registration desk where the picnic kit, for two, is handed out. Oddly enough this love kit also included a calendar of Lee Thompson, the bachelor.
The lengthy wait for the screening wasn’t eased by the DJ playing an assortment of James Blake and John Legend which just made me feel more like I was holding a candle for an oversized tepee brimming with blushing couples.
I couldn’t help but wonder what would’ve happened if load shedding had been scheduled at the time of this event.
A quick glance around the room and I noticed most of the gentlemen as if for a semi-casual look like they had just come from the office and changed the button-up shirt they wore all day to an identical one. Then there were gents with figure-hugging jeans, rolled up, with the brogues like Frodo Baggins.
A big screen was set up inside, with wine, popcorn and candy floss stands. It was quite a wait – especially when you’re alone in a room full of lovers snuggling and giggling. After setting up my solo picnic area, the first thing I did was twist open the complimentary Mr P Pinot Noir. A glass would’ve been appreciated but the plastic chalices had to make do.
After a while, even the wine couldn’t keep this from being painful. Smiles charged by lust and passion filled the room and I just couldn’t relate. I almost left before this Bachelor mess started. (The last thing we need is another locally produced bootleg or franchise show. We’ve done them all, haven’t we?)
But it was a clever day to launch this stupid show. The rain and red cushions all added to the mirage of this world florist day.
After the arduous medley of John Legend and what sounded like Matchbox Twenty, Bachelor Thompson addressed the room.
He said he would be watching it for the first time and was looking forward to it. He said it should be something special. How could it not be, Lee? Before this local one, The Bachelor franchise was licensed in 26 territories around the world … that’s very “special” indeed.
“I’m looking forward to reliving those moments and incredible experiences we had and reliving the fairy tale will be amazing.”
He thanked host Jason Greer for being the ultimate wingman. Greer then explained what we were about to watch, calling it “real” reality TV. He suggested quite a bit of the show was genuine. Right, like we have no idea how reality TV works.
M-Net played a Game of Thrones trailer which was the pinnacle of the night.
The contestants of Bachelor are a well-mixed group of womxn. I do always feel bad for the black womxn on the show, though. Besides adding drama, you can bet they probably won’t end up marrying a white man on TV – especially one that is broadcast on a channel the content of which is steered towards a white audience. The idea of 24 African queens jumping through the hoops, hoping to win the affection of this guy just doesn’t seem right.
The night was brought to a close with a performance by an Idols season six participant, Connell Cruise, who softly ushered the lovers home
