Here's why Avengers: Endgame is nothing but hype

2019-05-02 15:42

Avengers: Endgame might be the biggest blockbuster release of the year but Phumlani S Langa feels like the film is nothing but hype. 

Avengers: Endgame
Directors: Anthony Russo and Joe Russo
Starring: Josh Brolin, Brie Larson
2 stars out of 5 

The Avengers return in Endgame, the follow-up to last year’s highly impressive Infinity Wars in which Josh Brolin’s Thanos snapped his fingers and did away with half of the living organisms in the universe.

Unfortunately, Endgame is not as good I’m afraid, so don’t get too gassed up about it. At the core of my issues with this film is that I’m tired of watching these movies, man.

This one came across like an elaborate attempt to rake in more of my money. It was barely funny even, with characters like Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and The Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) going through a few quirky changes.

I don’t know who thought it would be a good idea to take my two favourite Avengers and warp them into these cuddly and bashful blokes. I thought that was what Captain America was for, and please don’t get me started on Chris Evans and his portrayal of the driest superhero of all time.

This film picks up right after Thanos did the finger snap with a magical gauntlet housing the infinity stones – colourful gems that all have certain powers.

The Avengers are in a bad way, half of their homies are dead, Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr) looks terrible and the world is devoid of any hope with half of its citizens missing.

They must rally and pick up the pieces somehow. Fortunately for them Ant-Man (Paul Rudd) has a plan that involves what he refers to as a time heist. Yes, the film you have been waiting to see for months is basically Back to the Future with spandex on.

So I’m sure you can guess what the idea is, right? You would think they would go back to a time when Thanos was young and vulnerable and off him. They opt for a more intricate approach, which bored me.

In fact, for a three-hour-long feature the end is probably what we were all waiting for – all the Avengers on the same screen.

What I found strange is heavyweight actors like Tilda Swinton (Ancient One), Michael Douglas, Angela Bassett (Ramonda) and Gwyneth Paltrow (Pepper Potts) all being limited to a scene or two. Characters like Star Lord (Chris Pratt) hardly said anything.

Instead I had to put up with an emotionally in-tune Hulk and a fat Thor. Brie Larson plays Captain Marvel for about three minutes of this feature.

That’s like having Ronaldo on the bench when fit to play. Samuel L Jackson (Nick Fury) doesn’t say a word. Easiest cheque he ever gripped. Just look at some of those names: Wasted.

Perhaps more of the budget needed to be put towards the graphics, which were quite cool but nothing I haven’t seen.

This film is predominantly gas and hype, but at least people like Paul Rudd and Josh Brolin brought as much as they could to the table.Next time they should avoid leaving all stars on the sidelines. How exactly do you have Samuel L Jackson say jack squat in a film? Not smart.

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April 5 2020